Crazy Dream #8

And another one. This time after my routine early morning pee…

The kid came out a normal infant. It hated the carrier, which we realized (after the crying and screaming, not before) was made of wire. We tried to put a blanket between the baby and the wire, but we almost squashed its head somehow.

We worked it out in some magical dream way and got the kid into the car. At some point, I turned to look at the backseat, and the kid looked like it was about 4 years old. Neither husband nor I freaked out like we should have, but I felt sad. Also, happy. On one hand, I didn’t get the early years. On the other hand, I might be able to get some sleep.

Woman Sleeping

Since the kid was old enough, we let it pick its own name, but first, we realized we hadn’t checked the sex. I asked the kid if s/he knew how to tell what s/he was, and s/he didn’t. I said (using my finger for a visual): “if you have a little dangly thing, you’re a boy, if you don’t, you’re a girl.” Excellent mothering skills, I know.

“What do you think I am?” s/he asked. It wasn’t the most obvious thing in the world, but both the husband and I told her we thought she was a girl.

“Girl,” she agreed, after looking under her skirt. Apparently, we had put a skirt on her.

Then, for the name. She wasn’t interested in any of the names we had picked out (figures) and ended up choosing the name of an old friend of mine who isn’t really a friend anymore.

The next time I looked back, she was a teenager and I was officially sad. She looked exactly like the friend who isn’t a friend. “You’re sure you want to be called that?” I asked. She nodded. I told her I was going to use a nickname that sounded like a boy’s name, because hus and I like that king of thing (our list is full of them – Charlie, Archie, Elliot, Billie). She made a face. Teenagers.

THE END

Is this a thing? Do the dreams come faster and weirder as the kid grows larger? I mean, they’re a better side effect than the back pain, the constant alien movement, and the peelets (the reason pantliners are now on my shopping list), but they’re weirding me out.

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