Everything is fine and then…

People kept saying it to us. You’ll find a norm, you’ll get comfortable, and then – bam – something happens. Teething, sickness, apocalyptic thunderstorms, a change in the star-moon alliance gridzone of astrology… Something changes and your nights are not your nights. Your baby is no longer your baby.

Mixon’s First Big Sick could have been much bigger and badder. It was a simple fever, no other symptoms, but because this was our first fever and because we couldn’t see our pediatrician the first time, we ended up at the doctor’s office twice. Both visits were a very necessary complete waste of time.

I know calling a fever a ‘big sick’ is hilarious to most of you, but we’ve had really good luck with Mix. He’s had two colds. Period. In his life. That’s mostly because we were all hermits for the first three months and didn’t really branch out a whole lot until recently. So for him (and for us), this was big.

He’s all better now and making up for the food he didn’t eat when he was sick (seriously, I need to get a funnel and just pour). We were lucky we still had formula to waste and at least a bit of milk still in the boob, because that’s basically what he lived on.

And now comes the process of getting back to that magic-eye mindset, where things just work themselves out. Last Blog Post Amanda was such a douche…

lala

Now, I have a baby who’s past one and still on formula and a tiny bit of boob, one who wakes up at least once a night wanting more of said formula or boob, and one nightmare of an evening that I’m having trouble getting out of my head.

This is compounded by the fact that hubs has been working a lot and will be gone the entire month of November. I will say again how much I do not know how single parents do it. There are some days when a few hours will make me want to curl up in a ball and leave the childcare to the dog and cats. The dread is building for me, the guilt is building for him, and the ‘la, la, las’ are sometimes not there when they need to be.

All I can say is that the hubs and I are ridiculously lucky to have our parents so much in the picture. Their worry barometer may be overly high, but that’s only because they would reach into their chests and pull out their hearts if it would help make the Mix feel better. I should have known it would be this way – the same goes for their own kids.

I know there are harder times to come, bigger sicks, and just little annoying ones that throw everything off. And then the return to normalcy will be another Sisyphean climb up a steep mountain. But at least we’re doing it with some pretty cool people.


Slow-Mo

34 weeks today, and I’m not exactly feeling…

More like…

I blame the last few days. Saturday, I ran in the morning, then my husband and I putDiptic together the crib and dresser. Between the run and the furniture, I for some reason decided I HAD to go to two garage sales in the neighborhood. This ended with me buying a dirty Peg Perego Centro stroller for $30 that I don’t want. Anyone want to take it off my hands? Anyone have a nice stroller they don’t need any more? STROLLERS. They will be the death of me.

Sunday, I spent the day ripping tags and packages from clothes and toys, which I washed on Monday.

Monday was a rough one. I ran/walked my three miles and then did wash all day. My back was extremely angry at me. I got out there this morning for a run(ish), but I’m afraid my days are numbered.

I’m trying to tell myself that’s okay.

I could have as little as a month left to cook this thing (less, if it’s a preemie), and I really want to do what’s best. Of course, most things I read say almost anything can be cured with exercise. I’m sure that’s why my pregnancy has been breezy up until now. I have my prenatal yoga and pilates DVDs, but I don’t  feel like that’s actual exercise. Cardio is where it’s at.

BUT MY BACK HURTS.

Okay, clearly this is a whining post. I just need to change how I feel about it. I can keep doing my DVDs, maybe run once a week, and try swimming, maybe. Though that seems boring. SUCK IT UP, 34 weeks!

(On that note, any suggestions/ideas you have for me on how not to feel like a fatberg would be much appreciated)


Light-headed, Cranky, and OVER IT

I think the worst part about having a breezy first trimester is that the second trimester kind of sucks. At least, it’s been a little sucky so far.

Not really. I can’t really complain, but I’ve been feeling achy and light-headed, and, if you couldn’t already tell CRANKY. So, yeah, okay, apparently, I can complain.

AHHHHH!!!!

Adding to the cranky: I’ve been trying to fill out my registry. I now despise all baby products and best-of lists. Every cutesy little product name, every review from some random mom, every time I find a NEW category of stroller, car seat, baby robot device, I want to punch someone in the face. Unfortunately, my husband is the one who usually takes the fire, though the dog has gotten her share, too.

I just let out a huge sigh, so I’ll put it in here, too. SIGH. This is THE WORST. (Yep, I definitely can complain.)

I want a stroller my infant can use, but I want a convertible car seat, but I want an all-terrain stroller, but I want it to fit into my trunk and travel easily, but I want to not spend/ask my friends to spend bajillions of dollars, but… but…

As of now, I’m thinking:

Mountain Buggy Urban Jungle Stroller (with face to face seat)

Evenflo Triumph 65 DLX car seat

ErgoBaby Carrier

DaVinci Kalani 4-in-1 crib

That’s as far as I’ve gotten, and I feel like I’ve been doing this for my entire life. If anyone has any opinions, please share them. And also: what else should I put on my registry? I’d like to have some stuff that normal people might want to actually buy for me.

One more also: We closed on our new house yesterday. Heading over there tonight, but we’re going to spread the move out, since we have our rental through the end of May.


I Will Begin to Think About the Enormity of Having a Child

I got a really thoughtful gift from my colleague over the weekend (who also happens to be an awesome mom): Baby 411. Or, as I like to baby-411-clear-answers-smart-advice-for-your-denise-fields-paperback-cover-artthink of it, The Encyclopedia of Baby.

It is very thick.

I can make lists and laugh about how much stuff I’m trying to cram into 2013, but getting into the details, the down-and-dirty of what it all entails can sink me quickly into a huge freak-out.

And I think that’s good. I should be freaking out. A little bit, at least. You know, if I want my kid to have clothes and food and happiness. Which I do.

My body is still acting pretty normal, though I had a nosebleed yesterday and a quite unpleasant bathroom experience this morning. I hear constipation is a thing when you’re pregnant. I may have seen the tip of that iceberg. *shudder*

I really like the book so far. And since I’m the type to read a magazine cover to cover (read: anal), I will most likely be reading this straight through. I love that it’s written by women and based on the science of things. I’m a rationalist, so I need evidence, research, etc. to help me weigh the pros/cons of things. I think this book is exactly what I need.

In other news, according to last week’s Wait Wait… Don’t Tell Me, there’s a study that shows women are more fertile when their parents live nearby. So, thanks for moving to Nashville, m&d!


In 2013, I Will Do All of the Things

Two years ago, I didn’t know how to boil an egg. I’m being literal here – I actually had to Google it. I’d baked a little before that, and I’d mixed together some guacamole, but that was about it.Screen Shot 2013-02-06 at 9.47.59 AM

Now, I make things. Still very, very easy things, but I can brown meat and boil veggies. It’s something.

I have a sneaking suspicion that my two-year transformation into a (sort of) responsible adult who pays bills on time and cooks dinner will look like a three-toed sloth’s journey from tree to tree by the end of this year (I’m reading Life of Pi right now – forgive the animal references).

This is the year when I will do all of the things. In order:

1. I will launch something cool for work. I’m a writer/producer for new media production company Bright Red Pixels. We do cool things and we will be launching something cool (and timely, for me) in March.

2. We hope to buy a house (where we live now, in Nashville). Trying to go FHA and trying to do it before April, for many confusing reasons.

3. We will finish writing our musical. We have to be done by May and REALLY done by July,Keep Calm because a theater in Florida is producing it then. My husband will be down there directing it starting in May, and I’m planning on being there a bit at the beginning and the end. If my calculations are correct, I’ll be about 7 months pregnant by the time the show goes up. 7 months pregnant in Florida in JULY helping put up a show that I helped write. GEAHHHHHH!

4. Sometime in there, if number 1 works out, we will move.

5. (maybe) We will help my mother-in-law move to Nashville.

6. I will have a baby. I think this will happen sometime in September. GEAHHHHH!

7. I will finish my young adult novel. This one gets the Most Likely to Not Happen award, although the house is a close second. I really like the book, though. I hope I finish.

8. WE WILL HAVE A BABY. This is about the aftermath. The actual having/enjoying/not sleeping of the baby.

9. I will try to start losing the weight.

10. We will take the baby down to Florida. They got the preview in July, now it’s time for the real thing. My husband’s huge family lives down there, so we want to have some show-and-tell baby time in December.

11. I will begin training for the half-marathon that I didn’t run this year (blame Ziggy!)

So, by the end of this year, I expect to look 30 years older and walk with a limp, but I also expect to be happier than I’ve ever been. We’ll see how it goes…